Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Make it a Stonewall Christmas

Poor Stonewall have been criticised on outintheuk for their uninspiring Christmas card selection this year (at least they haven't said something like "Happy Winterval").

They are a bit "safe" and "bland" and "uninspiring" aren't they. Well, fear not. As a staunch supporter of Stonewall, I've put my thinking cap on and have the following ideas for cards that reference gay issues and lifestyles in a more original and fun way.

How about a picture of a twink wearing just a Santa hat and a smile, with a hilariously suggestive slogan like "Who's cumming down YOUR chimney this Christmas?" or "Hasn't Santa got a big... SACK!"

Or if that's a bit too Clone Zone for you, how about a picture of reindeers feasting on the dead bodies of Mary Whitehouse, Cardinal Winning and Baroness Young, with the slogan "Have a Stonewall Christmas: we eat homophobia for breakfast, lunch and dinner!" (Very political)

Too grotesque? How about a queer rendition of the Nativity scene, with three drag queens presenting gifts of CK1, Poppers and lube to Mary (Judy Garland) and Joseph (Paul Burrell) while baby Jesus is depicted as Ellen Degeneres and the Angel Gabriel is Quentin Crisp, hovering above the manager with a big shit-eating grin on his face.

I love helping, I do.


Old Cheeser said...

I think you've made some excellent suggestions for Xmas cards there, given how boring the Stonewall ones are. I am sure they would go down well with all Xmas shoppers, so to speak.

Along similar lines, how about purchasing a card from here?

(If that doesn't work just type in www.kissmekwik.co.uk in your browser and take a look at the Xmas cards section - unbridled joy!!)

matty said...

I was thinking of skipping the whole Christmas card thing this year but you've inspired me.

Maybe I won't.

You know, i did see a card I rather liked --- it had a photo of US President/War Lord Bush and his family - it read, "Piss on Earth" ...It made me laugh. ...and, then I cried.

Maybe I should make my own this year.

Yes! That is the Ticket I think!

Hey, Sandy Farina posted a comment to my blog! It made me do a back flip in my fave gay cafe! I got looks.