Sunday, September 17, 2006

Must try harder

I came across some old school photos today. Here are a few of my old PE teachers. Sexy no? Believe me, by the standards of the late 70s/early 80s, these guys were hot hot hot, representing the ultimate in masculinity.

I was never very sporty at school (C for attainment C for attitude was my usual mark). Me and my exceedingly camp friend would always be picked last for teams and then hover on the sidelines of the football pitch, bitching about everyone else (a pattern that was to become deeply ingrained behaviour in almost every aspect of my life from that point on). In the last few years, I played truant from sports altogether - it was simpler than devising complicated illnesses every week. I used to walk out of the school building and go to my grandmother's house where I'd pretend the school was on strike (again). Then I'd sit with her and drink cups of tea while her home help visited. For some reason I never got caught, although I'm sure it must have been obvious to everyone what I was doing. I think they just knew I was a lost cause.

Ironically, now I go to the gym almost every day. I'd like to think that all of the sporty kids at my school are now morbidly obese, flopped out in front of the tv 24/7, wheezing as they crack open another can of Bud, while throwing yet another Big Mac down their throats. I think that if my old PE teachers could see me now, they'd be giving ME an A for an attainment (but definitely an E for attitude).


KAZ said...

After looking at this lot of no hopers - I'm not surprised you preferred your Gran.

Lost Boy said...

What a grim edition of Blind Date those three 'contestants' would have made.

matty said...

I'd have done 'em!

I have this odd fetish for male gym teachers. ...go figure.