Thursday, March 02, 2006

Has Footballers Wives jumped the shark?



I am catching up on tv after the week in Istanbul, and I think Footballers Wives might be getting a bit stale - I made good use of Tivo's fast-forward button. The much vaunted bitch-fight between Tanya Turner and Joan Collins isn't until episode 5 and I gather they're only in it for 2 episodes, which is a shame. The focus has turned to some of the newer characters who I don't think are as capable of pulling of the kitsch drama as well as old Tanya - although arch-rival Amber is giving it her best shot. New character Tremaine Gidigbi is a welcome addition. I liked how he dressed up as a slave at one of the typically over-the-top Pride and Prejudice themed weddings, because that's what black people were in the days of Jane Austen. I've also noticed that the changing room sequences now have a gaggle of full-frontal naked extras in the background, their penises competing (and winning) with the dialogue and drama in the foreground. It's the end of civilisation.

I don't heart London

I was in London yesterday and never cease to be amazed at how "assertive" (ie rude) they are. If you want a laugh, try watching me and my fella attempt to hail a taxi in the middle of freezing weather on a busy London street. We were beaten to the post several times by dead-eyed Londoners who pushed past us. It was the same on the Tube at rush hour. I hadn't realised how busy it gets - trains pull up - doors open, you move to get on board and realise that there is no more space - at that point it becomes the law of the jungle. Some 3ft 6inches bitch-in-headphones pushed past me in a milisecond and was on the train, taking up the only available space, before I could blink. It was like seeing a flea jump - one minute they're in one place - the next they're elsewhere. Elsewhere, I saw numerous cases of road-rage. And everywhere, everywhere! I went, I could hear that impatient refrain "Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah!" from people so bored and impatient at hearing their companions speak that they have to rush them along, so it can be their turn and all about them.

Now, is it the case that people start off with good manners, but gradually, London sucks their souls dry and they become hard-faced cows? Or maybe it acts as a huge ass-hole magnet - attracting all the scum of Britain - like flies on a big stinking dog poo? (Of course, you do realise I'm making generalisations - there are plenty of nice people in London too - though I don't know how they cope. I'd be picking off random people from the top of a tall building, given a month there.)

6 comments:

Lost Boy said...

Oh, Lubin, welcome to my world. I think London makes people ruthless. A lot of people move here to 'further' their careers and so they think that they have to behave like ball-breaking bitches of the boardroom outside of the office too. London drives me insane and yet, at the moment, I can't imagine living anywhere else. Is there any hope for me?!?

comatose said...

London is fantastically exciting to visit, but I'd rather be a hobo and sleep in a ditch than live there. One of my bugbears is the attitude of Londoners to anyone who doesn't live at the centre of the universe. You chat to someone on gaydar and they always say "so when are you going to come to London?" (never the other way round) grrrrr!

Deano said...

I have to agree. I've been working in London since Sept and cant wait to get back home in April. The utter fucking rudeness of the capitals residents never fails to astound me. Last week I saw a women unconciocious in the road outside the Bank of England. She'd been run over by a cab and had head injurys. People were stepping over her prone body to get back to work on time! I even heard one man utter "For fucks sake" when a copper stopped him crossing the scene. What is it about London that turns people evil? I'm glad Im not staying long enough to become one of them.

Dessie said...

London does at least wear its heart on its sleeve. You know where you are, and when you know what to expect you just give it back in spades. Personally I love the place, but then I am often referred to as a cold hearted bitch. I think it helps if you spent a lot of time here, but stay away from the after-hours culture. That's what seems to turn people.

Boston was far far worse in my opinion, and Seattle even worse. If you want to see the corruption of money, spend a weekend in Seattle.

hey,Beave! said...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah..... :0)

Bob said...

Except for people being total self-centered idiots on the tube, I don't find London all that rude. I've been here about 18 months and love it. Maybe it's perspective ... I lived in New York for 12 years.

I agrree with Dessie though ... Boston is horrible.