Saturday, November 12, 2005


Oh, for the days when simply stringing together a string of nonsense syllables and dressing up as a school boy could make you famous! Do you remember The Krankies? When I lived in Peterlee Co. Durham there was a rumour going round that they used to live a few streets away from me in a council house. I'm sure it was just made up though.

In preparation for Panto season, I have been looking at their fabulous website. It's kind of retro - just like them. Imagine they had a time machine, went back to 1971 and then built their website there. You get the idea. An annoying theme tune that starts playing right away, animated gifs, an aol email address and shameless mis-use of the apostrophe and caps-lock: "MUM'S, DAD'S... DO YOU HAVE KIDS..."

In their biography page the narrative breathlessly begins: "Yes, the Krankies are back. In fact, they never went away." There are also excited reviews from The Northern Echo "anarchic humour", the Evening Echo Bournemouth "extraordinary" and The Glasgow Herald "unstinting energy".

However, the Krankies are so famous that they warrant not one website but two! Over at under the heading "Janettes Terrible Accident" (what's with the missing apostrophe) we are told "As you probably have heard Janette had a terrible accident on the 15th December 2004 resulting in the both of us withdrawing from the Pavilion Theatre Glasgow Pantomime "Jack And The Beanstalk"." The site doesn't go into the gory details but there are a few links to news websites where you can find out the horrible truth for yourself. And it's a gory affair. Apparently, during a performance of Jack and the Beanstalk, the beanstalk collapsed (while she was up it), sending her plummeting 20ft and resulting in a perforating ear drum among other injuries. Poor Janette. Who knew that performing in Panto was so dangerous!


Elaine said...

I adored 'The Krankies' cameo in the French and Saunders pastiche of 'Silence Of The Lambs'.

Again, in 'Absolutely Fabulous' Series 5, when Jannette Krankie played the role of the midwife. It was so strange to see her without that schoolboy cap on and a catapult in her hand.

matty said...

I only know of the Krankies thanks to the wonders of French & Saunders. ...they scare me. The Krankies. Not F&S.

I am in love with Nathan Barley, tho. Altho, I guess that has nothing to do with anything. Just had to share the warmth.