Tuesday, February 08, 2005

I can't believe it's 2005. I still feel like it's the 1990s. I keep remembering things that happened to me and then realise that it occurred in 1995 and was a decade ago - but it seems like yesterday. When did time speed up, and is it just happening to me, and can I get it to slow down again (without resorting to medication?)

Speaking of medication, I have had a cold since the end of December, which has now settled down into a painful sore throat. I work with a lot of international students and Lancaster is basically a giant petri dish where you have a 68% chance of catching some new strain of bird flu or pig flu every time you step outside. I had my defective tonsils taken out a few years ago (which was a lot of fun), and this seems to make colds last a lot longer than they used to. I think this year I will get the "flu jab". I phoned my doctor about it over lunch, to be told that as I'm not eligible as I don't have a heart condition etc. "But I MUST have that flu jab!" I told the receptionist. "Well, Boots might do it for a fee" she said conspiratorially. As usual, Boots end up being my drug pushers. At least I have a store card.

My fella has given away/sold loads of his Dr Who VHS tapes so there is space again on the shelves and I have been having an ebay order orgy as a result: a best of Deelite cd (I listened to them in various dingy student flats in Preston and Newcastle in the early 1990s), Scream 3 (only for Parker Posey and Heather Matarazzo), The Art of Cruising Men (weird gay oddity), Broken Hearts Club (awful film, but Dean Cain I'm afraid - what can I say?) and Sunday Bloody Sunday (one of those films I never got round to watching).

Everyone seems really excited about Ellen MacCarther and her boat journey at the moment. Well done to her - but I don't think she's the sort of person I'd like to end up sitting next to at a dinner party. Unless she grew her hair out and could recite whole sequences of "Oranges are Not the Only Fruit".

Finally, oh hurrah, there is a new STD in town, which goes by the name of lymphogranuloma venereum (what a mouthful - I think it needs a snappy street name). Apparently it's been found in gay men and symptoms include swollen lymph glands, groin ulcers, and blood and pus in your poo. *Looks up to the sky* - Thankyou! Because that's ALL we need.

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